Young Leo - how he fell in love and got himself a job...
Young Leo was a layabout, forever on the dole
His mum said “Go and get a job you lazy little …soul!
All you do is lie on t’couch and sup your father’s ale
Like people what we read about in blooming Daily Mail!”
One day while Leo lay on couch with six pack in his hand
Clutching his remote control with movies on demand
Salvation Army Band came round – their music it were grand –
With rousing tunes and songs and hymns about the Promised Land -
Leo liked it a great deal and at the brassy sound
He dropped his six pack on the floor and threw the window down
And there he spied a comely lass with trumpet to her lips
Blonde of hair and fair of face, a-wiggling her hips -
Leo fell - head over heels, and told her in a flash
“I was a worthless sofa spud* – you’ve turned me into mash!”
He swore true love forever, serenaded her with odes -
But she rejected him and cried “You’re laziest of toads!
How could I love a man like you, who’s always on the dole?
Go get yourself a job you slob – emancipate your soul!”
She didn’t mean that sole at all, the one that’s on your shoe –
She meant the metaphysic one, but he did misconstrue
And took a job in local shop, whose adverts he had seen,
“The oldest leather shop in town - and Cobblers to the Queen!”
(* = couch potato)
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